I have a story. In my story I'm in it from the past until now, I'm done with my story. I was thinking of my past instead of the present. I went back to look through the chapters to see if any pages in my story were blank again. In the chapters in my story, the pages were missing. I'm going to the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and 5th chapters as I continue to look through my story, the pages I thought were missing. They were blank as if I had closed my eyes and become blind. It was the other dark side of me that I hadn't seen in a long time. In some of the chapters, the pages were black.
I realized I have torn the pages out of my life because I didn't want the darkness of my life to be in my story. I want to find those pages in my life that I've torn out. I was looking and looking until I found them. They were torn and ripped. I tried to tape the ripped pages back into my story. I couldn't put half of my life into the story again. I still felt incomplete in my life trying to put my life as a whole again. Maybe these dark blank pages are in the chapters of my story. Asking, why? I don't know, why? I'm trying, I'm trying to put the ripped pages that have been torn out of my life that have been torn out. I stopped, and I said, I'm tired of this story. I'm done with this story. It's time to tell a new story. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done with my past and I'm taking advantage of it. I'm done talking to people who only want to talk to you when they want something.
Chapter 1 let's start as far as l can remember. Can you relate to talking to someone you didn't want to talk to, but you wanted to be respectful? That's me. I knew I could've given more respect than I did. Over the years I was pulling myself away. The more I was around we talked. I'm not paying attention, but I listened thinking in my mind saying, Please finish this conversation. I'm hanging on by a thread ready to cut it. I'm going to regret it. I know I am. I'm cutting the thread. I'm done. When that time comes that's the risk I'm going to have to take.
Chapter 2 I have had the same friends ever since I was a child. Well, I thought they were my friends. From time to time I would see them. It never feels like they are bringing up what we did in the past. Who is together now? Why? We don't hang out anymore. Getting into my business. Asking me questions about my life. At the same time, they don't want me to know about theirs. I'm not better than them I just don't want to be around the same atmosphere as when I was younger. I'm done. Don't get me wrong. I like hearing from them now and then. I realize that my true friends don't have to talk to someone every day.
Chapter 3 Do you pray for someone to get out of your life because they're bringing you down? It happened to me. I prayed and prayed for this person to get out of my life. I prayed 3 times to get someone out of my life. The 1st time I prayed they came back. The 2nd time I prayed they came less. 3rd time I prayed. I prayed harder and harder. Asking. Why? Why? They won't get out of my life. Days went by. Weeks went by. I didn't see them anymore. I believed my prayers had been answered. At the same time. I was getting out of someone else's life. To whom I've been pleased to get their attention. My prayers backfired on me. The tables turned on me. I wanted one out of my life while I was going out of the other person's life. Watch what you pray for because you get the opposite.
Chapter 3 I'm done with people walking on me like I'm a doormat. People call me just to talk I listen. When they want to tell me what they're going through I listen. People call me. In the morning, at noon even in the middle of the night. That's me being patient. People fail to realize I'm not a recorder. I'm supposed to listen and not supposed to talk. I can't push the pause button on the recorder whenever I want to talk. I'm pushing the stop button. It is stuck! I'm pushing and pushing. I can't get it unstuck. What can I do to get it to unstick? I'm trying to push the push button again this time it worked. I said I'm done, being a recorder. They're shocked that those words were coming out of their mouth. They said I didn't know that you felt that. I said, Yes, I feel like that because you never let me talk. I'm done being your recorder.
In chapter 4 of the previous chapter I said, Watch what you're praying for. Thiers someone I wanted to be in my life. It seems as if I didn't exist anymore in their’s. Over the years we became more distant from each other. I couldn't believe it; this is happening to me. After all these years I thought we were doing well. Well, I thought we were. I'm tired of trying to figure it out. I'm done trying too.
Chapter 5 I'm done, with people asking me for advice. They go to someone else they would rather take their advice instead. They get their advice instead of my opinion. They realize they should've listened to their mind at first. They come back to me to say, I should've listened to you. No. I told you to listen to your own mind. Nobody should tell you anything that you should do with your life.
In this story, a lot of my life is going to change throughout these chapters. In my other story, my life was incomplete. The pages were missing. It wasn't the whole story of my life. It told one side and not the other. You need to tell the whole story.
By EarthAngel
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